Cute Axolotl Plush: which one to actually buy (a biased guide from an axolotl)

the best cute axolotl plush is a soft one with the gills done properly, big enough to actually hold, and made by someone who cared. the xoxi the axolotl plushie is momokakkoii's version: nine inches, and modelled on me, so my objectivity here is somewhere around zero.

hi. it's xoxi. you are shopping for a plush version of my species and i have very strong feelings about how it should be done 🌸

what makes an axolotl plush actually good

three things, and most mass produced ones get at least one wrong.

the gills. this is the whole animal. the frilly bits on the sides of the head are what makes an axolotl an axolotl, and cheap plushies flatten them into sad little nubs. they should be full, soft and slightly ridiculous.

the smile. axolotls look like they are permanently, gently pleased about something. that upturned mouth is why the internet fell in love with us. if the face looks neutral or worried, the maker did not understand the assignment.

the squish. a plush you cannot squeeze is a decoration. it should be soft enough to hold during a bad phone call.

there is a reason the face works, by the way. axolotls are neotenic, which means we keep our juvenile form and our external gills for our entire lives instead of metamorphosing the way other salamanders do. we never grow out of looking like babies. that is not an aesthetic choice, it is biology, and it is exactly why we translate so well into plush.

the xoxi plushie (the main one)

the xoxi the axolotl plushie is the one people mean when they search for a cute axolotl plush from us, and it is one of our steadiest sellers, which i take entirely personally in a good way.

nine inches is the useful size. big enough to hold properly and to sit visibly on a bed or a desk, small enough to go in a bag or fit under an arm. the gills are done properly. i checked. i am the reference material.

the cowboy one, if the person is like that

some people do not want a normal plush, they want a plush with a bit going on. for them there is cowboy xoxi, seven inches, me in a cowboy hat, committing fully.

this is the version you buy for someone whose sense of humour you already know. it is not the safe pick. it is the funnier one.

which one for which person

for a kid: the standard nine inch plushie. sturdy, squishy, no small parts to lose.

for an adult who will not admit they want a plush: also the standard one. put it on their desk and say nothing. the emotional support plush guide explains why this works better than it should.

for the funny friend: cowboy xoxi, obviously.

for the person who already has one: go sideways rather than bigger. the lavender axolotl beanie or the axolotl mini backpack gives them more of me without a duplicate on the shelf.

more soft things live in the plushies collection if a frog or a capybara turns out to be more their character.

a small honest note

if you are buying an axolotl plush because you love axolotls, it is worth knowing the real ones are critically endangered, down to a few hundred individuals in the canals near mexico city. i wrote a proper page about it and it is the one post of mine that is not trying to sell you anything.

buying a plush does not save them. knowing about it costs nothing though.

one more thing before i swim off

pick the plush by the face. hold the photo at arm's length and see whether it makes you feel something. that sounds unscientific and it is the only test that has ever worked.

if it does, that is your one. if it does not, keep looking, because a plush you feel nothing about is just an object taking up space on a shelf.

i'm xoxi. still smiling, now available in soft form 🌸